Sub Rosa

Managed to get into my statement of results and found that I have a provisional mark of 66% for the Auschwitz essay.  A very safe 2:1 for that, then - still not confirmed by my lecturer, as yet. A provisional yeeee haaaawwww.  I have to work out the stats as it leaves me 60 credits for the major dissertation and a final 20 credits for satire (beginning September 2016).  I need to find out what I need to get an overall very safe 2:1.

Final day because even if the deadline is midday Friday, I really don't think that I want to spend too much more time on this.  The process is just horrendous, lots of footage and personal accounts.  I am moaning about dreadful nightmares, yet I have only just read about it - I haven't personally experienced or seen the buildings today.  Fellow colleagues now want to see the place.  I couldn't stomach it, coward that I am.  I just want to write a good essay and stand up for those who suffered in it, regardless of nationality.

Genocide - an ugly word and it still happens all over the world today.

18:03
Have 140 words to lose - have paced the office and at last minute, my eyes spy an Art Spiegleman book.  Is it possible to smuggle Maus in there somehow, or should I perish the thought? Is that a flash of brilliance, or a step of stupidity too far? It would not trivialise the work....hmm

23:30
The bloody assignment is finally done - thank God!  Itching to upload it now, but should really do it tomorrow so I can proof read it with fresh eyes (not that I haven't read it over at least 10 times).

EDIT:::Uploaded - couldn't wait to get shot of it.

More of the same and I am in effective lockdown.  I have to shave off 1,000 words before adding sprinkles - I maybe gone for some time :-(

19:47
After lengthy rewriting and editing, I have brought the word count down from 3,375 to 3,296 - a whopping 79 words.  Coming away from the computer to have a late dinner :-/

22:32
TBH, I can't concentrate anymore.  Think I need to do a bit of reading and see if I can subtract some of the 'all-but-the-kitchen-sink' stuff that I deem to have in it.

Still appraising this essay.  The suject is harrowing and the problem is, I can identify with some of it.  A subject I am not prepared t discuss on here, suffice to say that I can recognise a lot of the coping mechanisms that evolve in times of abuse.  The only thing I can do is knuckle down and finish it, say goodbye to a challenging academic year.  Do the research this summer re the dissertation, start it in September, do the satire module from February to May then the whole lot is done.

23:12
I remember now why I have such tummy problems. It's down to being tied to a desk with few breaks and the wrong food being shoved in at regular intervals. 2,850 and I am only about 75% the way through the second draft.  Today, I entertained my niece for a few hours, tomorrow my granddaughter Aimee will be here.  Then I will have to finish and seriously rewrite massive chunks (I already have 500 words hacked out, which are residing in a 'word dump' document that I created, just in case I need to paste something else back in); plus fold some academic sprinkles into the mix.

My intestines have knotted and have threatened to jump up through my stomach if I don't stop abusing my digestive system.  I am far too old to be living like a sugar-driven student hack, shoving packets of custard creams and gallons of coffee down my gullet (no I didn't either, but my system is not thappy guzzling mint tea, Nakd bars and pasta either).

I have ten gallon feet too :-(

Trying to separate the two indicators of imprisonment are bloody nigh on imposible, but as every lecturer is a pendantic, nitpicking ****, I have to come up with clear boudaries and NOT GO OFF TOPIC.  Currently digging through sociology and psychology books to add weight to any argument is not easy, either and at least 3 books are crammed with yellow Post It notes.

Getting a little more into the swing of this now.  Will not post word count as I have written bundles of stuff spread over 4 documents. Am cracking on with it as P2 is coming back home tonight and this will be on top of other distractions I have had come my way.

16:56
1,105 - even though I have broken the 1,000 count, I have 1,500 to do.  IRL, I am only about 20-30% the way through the first draft.  I do feel like I have made process, but now have to pack things up and wait for Baby Bear's return.

Well, it begins - 237 words so far and most of that is essay plan and the first paragraph.  It will be about the portrayal of physical/physical imprisonment and how the former impacts upon the latter.  Right now, I am concentrating on his stats and the social psychology of imprisonment.  Still no sign of the Cadaverland book, which is most irritating.

Final essay of the unit and I have confirmed the Project in Critical Writing (Major Dissertation) and the last three-piece module next February - Laughing Matters: the Importance of Satire.  One day I will find this all sartorially amusing.....meanwhile, back to the grindstone.

20:20
700 + words, but I think at least 200 will be scrapped.  Is the way of the word and I will resume tomorrow :-/

I have managed up til page 62 and have been distracted by learning to make rag rugs.  This is the test piece and now I will move on to bigger and hopefully better things - but not until the Levi assignment has been done.

Well, I have settled down and read/annotated the material around the Levi book, plus notes from the PP that I missed. I have ordered books on the social psychology of war; one is particularly disturbing, the aptly-named Cadaverland. They are several key behaviours in such situations and it is quite horrifying how preconceived ideas of supposed civilisation are quickly unmasked and how humans descend to the inhumane level.